It's gone kind of like this:
Elizabeth sits down with a McDouble and cold glass of Dr. Pepper and gleefully types out a mediocre blog post.
"Hey," she thinks to herself, "this isn't half bad."
Feeling nostalgic, she goes back to read some of her older blog posts.
"Dang." she mutters under her breath, "I used to be way more clever than I am now. I'll just have to write about something even better. Let's see.
I've already covered MacGuyver.
And Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego.
And kids lighting couches on fire in my driveway.
Hmm. I don't know if I can top that.
Unless a gang of hooligans uses a molotov cocktail to light fire to a whole bedroom set on my front porch.
No, that sounds pretty dangerous.
Then Elizabeth closes her browser window and stares blankly while scrolling through pinterest for three hours, planning which scarf she's going to make out of old t-shirts next.The end.
No, this road back to blogging hasn't been easy. I have a few tricks up my sleeve to come up with ideas.
1. I think of my childhood memories. There's enough material there to last years.
2. I think of the ridiculous things my kids have done lately. I actually have a list of them on my computer in a Word document. I'm such a great mom.Today I went to thesaurus.com because I couldn't think of the word "nostalgic." I actually didn't find it on the website because I got distracted. What did I get distracted by, you ask? This.
3. I go to thesaurus.com They usually have some crazy words that sometimes will trigger a thought process in my weirdo brain. A lot of times I go there when I'm stuck and can't find the right word to finish my thought.
Thesaurus.com challenged me to a duel of perspicacity. (I looked that up on thesaurus.com) A showdown of the ages. They asked me "How Many Words Do You Know? Take our test!" Challenge accepted.
You can't slap me in the face with your leather glove and expect me to walk away. Okay. Most of the time you can. But if it's a challenge to take an online quiz that determines the size and skill level of my vocabulary, I'm in.
You know what? I did pretty well. I'm not going to say how well, because I don't want to be a braggart, but I'm pretty impressed with myself.
I think I'm on par with a college professor or something. Astronaut. Neurosurgeon. Linguist. Something like that.
You know me.... the Bible College drop out. The girl who told people she wanted to be Amy Grant when she grew up.
The truth is I'm kind of past my prime. I was one of those really smart kids in school. You know, one of those "Gifted and Talented" students. I remember when I was in first grade, the school counselor pulled me out of class for an evaluation.
Of course they didn't tell me what the evaluation was for. I thought they were checking for learning disabilities. Or because I talked funny.
She started asking me to choose definitions for words she would give me. They started out easy. Cat. Shoe. Stuff like that.
Soon the words got harder and harder. They turned into contiguous and perpendicular. Splendorific. (I made that one up. Just want to make sure you're paying attention.)
I faintly remember feeling like crying and thinking they were going to kick me out of the school for being dumb.
I hadn't felt this stupid since the day my kindergarten teacher took us outside to show us that the blue sky goes all the way to the ground because she was sick of us coloring our pictures with the sky being a thin ribbon of blue at the top of our papers.
The thing is they weren't being mean.
I had to be tested to see how far I could go.
I had to be stretched so I had room to grow. (bam. That rhymed. I should be a slam poet.)
Even today I get in those situations that feel ridiculously impossible that make me want to cry and think about how dumb I am and how I'm failing everyone, especially God.
But really I'm just being stretched.
Because those words that stumped me as a child are a part of my vocabulary now.
Okay, maybe not contiguous.
But most of them. Which mean the impossible was attainable. Once I grew.
So, don't give up or be too hard on yourself when you fail. Don't feel like God abandoned you if you are in the midst of an impossible situation.
He may just be preparing you for something bigger.
Because He loves you.
And He knows your potential. Better than you know yourself.